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Belligerent BeneficiaryThe belligerent beneficiary is a type of beneficiary that feels slighted by the estate. For whatever reason a beneficiary feels slighted, the beneficiary becomes belligerent by acting out towards the estate and the executor in any of the following ways:

  • A beneficiary may try to insert themselves into the process by continually demanding updates, reports, or accountings.
  • A beneficiary can threaten to exercise their right to contest the will or threaten a lawsuit.
  • Feeling slighted, a beneficiary may become uncooperative by withholding information needed by the estate such as signed assent forms.
  • A beneficiary may try to harass the executor into giving them more property than otherwise entitled.

Regardless of how a beneficiary behaves towards the estate, the executor must respect the rights of each beneficiary and treat them professionally, fairly, and, if necessary, firmly.

A Demanding Beneficiary becomes Belligerent

In the estate I managed, I had to deal with a beneficiary that was demanding as described in the article A Demanding Beneficiary and the Wish List for Possessions. In the article, I told the beneficiaries of a limited distribution because of the few possessions available. Soon after, the demanding beneficiary became belligerent and remained that way through most of the process. However, as executor, I was confident that I could manage this beneficiary for three important reasons:  

  • By following the guidance of my attorney, I was competently handling the estate.
  • I was administering the estate within the laws set forth by the probate court.
  • I was administering the estate in accordance with the will.

If an executor follows the above mentioned rules, then the belligerent beneficiary becomes nothing more than a nuisance to the executor. In my estate administration, this is how I handled the belligerent beneficiary:

Communicate with all the Beneficiaries

In the article Communicating with the Beneficiaries is Essential for the Executor, the beneficiaries received updates from me on a regular basis. As a result, most of the beneficiaries were respectful and all of them were cooperative.

Have all Complaints go to the Executor

When the attorney told me that a beneficiary called to complain about me concerning personal possessions, I knew two things right away:

  • The demanding beneficiary has now become belligerent.
  • If I didn’t stop this behavior, other beneficiaries may call the attorney directly, running up expenses.

To stop this behavior, I asked the attorney to refer all complaints to me. The attorney agreed. This rule had the following results:

  • It sent a message to all the beneficiaries that the attorney represents the executor, not the beneficiaries, in this estate. So, if a beneficiary wanted to sue me, as executor, they would have to hire their own attorney.
  • As executor, I knew all the concerns of every beneficiary. This allowed me to work with the beneficiary to solve a problem without incurring expenses.

This rule didn’t stop the belligerent beneficiary from calling the attorney instantly. However, after constant rejection by the attorney, the beneficiary got the message.

Treat all Beneficiaries Fairly

From the beginning of the estate administration, the belligerent beneficiary wanted to be part of the process. In the early stage of the process, the beneficiary called  and ordered me to give an update on my progress and the estate account balance. In a professional way, I refused the demand explaining that it was too early in the process to give progress updates. After the conversation, I communicated the following to all beneficiaries: 

  • I will continue to communicate with all beneficiaries on a regular basis. When there is progress to report, I will include the information in the communication.
  • I will provide a final accounting at the end of the administration when all debts, taxes, and assets have been settled.  
  • As beneficiaries, expect fair and equal treatment from me. Not one beneficiary will receive more than otherwise entitled.
  • All beneficiaries are part of the process. At some point, assent forms need signing from all beneficiaries. Also, if I need the services of a beneficiary, I will contact them directly.

After that communication, disruptive behavior by the belligerent beneficiary ceased. In fact, the belligerent beneficiary was cooperative when needed throughout the entire process.

Executor Confidence is Crucial to Thwart Threats

After denial from any extra involvement in the estate settlement process, the belligerent beneficiary continued the fight over property. The belligerent beneficiary, still upset about the way I distributed the personal possessions, threatened to sue me. As mentioned above, a lawsuit didn’t concern me because I was confident in how I was proceeding. So, when the belligerent beneficiary called to threaten me, I agreed that we should settle the dispute in court. The beneficiary brought the belligerence up a notch, but in the end, a lawsuit never transpired. 

Remain Resolute against Harassment

Still upset about the personal possessions, the belligerent beneficiary started a harassment campaign. Early in the process, I distributed all the personal possessions to the beneficiaries. However, the belligerent beneficiary wouldn’t accept the possessions in the way I distributed them. So, I stored the possessions in the basement of the estate property and continued on with the settlement process.

On occasion, the beneficiary would call and ask about the possessions. The beneficiary wanted to know if I was ready to lay out the possessions for inspection and selection. Without fail, the response was always “make arrangements to pick up the possessions”. This dance continued for a while until I settled all the assets.

Once I settled the assets, I was fed up with the behavior and I gave the belligerent beneficiary an ultimatum. In an email, the belligerent beneficiary was given a deadline of one week to pick up the possessions or I would claim the possessions and distribute them among the other beneficiaries. The belligerent beneficiary knew that the will provided no instructions to distribute personal possessions. So, having no recourse, the belligerent beneficiary relented and claimed the possessions.

Conclusion

Standing firm didn’t end the battle over the possessions, but it ended the constant harassment and got the possessions moved.

Moreover, I never had a problem with cooperation from the belligerent beneficiary. This beneficiary wanted more property than otherwise entitled. So, uncooperative behavior wouldn’t serve the agenda well.

In the end, not all estates are the same. The degree of difficulty involves many factors including beneficiaries.  However, if the executor administers their estate competently within the laws of the probate court and by the will, the executor should have nothing to worry about. The belligerent beneficiary becomes nothing more than a nuisance. 

Are there other ways you can think of to handle belligerent beneficiaries? Is this article helpful in handling difficult beneficiaries? Enter your questions or comments in the comment section below.